When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough. 

When you don't do it, you're lazy. 

When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy. 

When you make a mistake, you're an idiot. 

When your boss makes a mistake, he's only human. 

When doing something without being told, you're overstepping our authority. 

When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative. 

When you take a stand, you're being bull-headed. 

When your boss does it, he's being firm. 

When you overlooked a rule of etiquette, you're being rude. 

When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original. 

When you please your boss, you're apple polishing. 

When your boss pleases his boss, he's being co-operative. 

When you're out of the office, you're wandering around. 

When your boss is out of the office, he's on business. 

When you're on a day off sick, you're always sick. 

When your boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill. 

When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview. 

When your boss applies for leave, it's because he's verworked.